I stayed inside all day yesterday except to eat. After exhausting myself for days on end, I got to the point where I heard myself say “oh great. Another fucking pretty crutch. Whoopeeee.” I don’t like that I have this attitude! But I’m used to spending longer periods of time in a few places instead of short periods of time in many places. This fast-food type approach to travel has never been my style. But since part of this trip was a recon mission to see where I might want to spend long periods of time later on, it seemed necessary. But I’m over it. I’m a very bad tourist. I don’t really give a shit about any of the sights unless they’re pretty. I’d much rather drop into a town and hang out with locals and feel like I belong there. And if I see touristy stuff, it’s only fun for me through a local’s eyes. Tourists to me feel like perpetual invaders and I don’t like feeling like I’m consuming a culture or watching a play. I want to be IN the play. Maybe this is ridiculous but it’s how I’ve always been. This need to feel like I could belong anywhere has always been something I’ve clung to in order to avoid feeling alone in the world. I don’t know why this is so important to me but it is. So today I realized I should at least see the old part of Valencia since I’m here. I’m glad I did. I lasted all of an hour though and now I’m spending the rest of the day writing in a cafe. My waitress talks to me and I like that. She thought I was Spanish until I opened my mouth. I really like that.
Here’s a mini tour of Valencia. Or rather the things I found funny or interesting. I alway give money to these artists cuz, just like in nyc, they make things more interesting. The shit they do is so random sometimes. I’m also fascinated by segways.They to me are the most touristy thing on the planet so I’m not sure I’s ever be caught on one. Then again, they look fun!
Yesterday I stayed in my beautiful bedroom pretty much all day and ate £1 bag of popcorn and nibbled on a £2 block of cheese I’ve been working on for three days now. That’s what eat often cuz I’m a cheap ass MF and I also just found out my full time babysitting gig I was coming home to is over cuz they killed off the mom I was working for’s character on her big tv show so she took her kid back to nyc 2 months early. So I’m super stressed about money and am pinching pennies even more the before (which was already pretty extreme). But I am forcing myself to at least eat a snack of real food once a day. So at 11:30 last night I went to this tapas bar and ordered mushroom quiche for £2. The waitress forgot to tell me the main ingredient is bacon lol. She I picked it apart and ate what I could cuz when you don’t know the language and when you’re not in America, it’s really not worth trying to complain or send it back. This fascinating tv show was on though. These two men had to lay on the ground and spell out letters to a word. Then a man and a woman did the same. What struck me was how unlikely this show would exist in America. Men aren’t allowed to touch each other and even men and women aren’t without it seeming sexual. This lady’s head was straight up in this dude’s crotch multiple times and everyone just laughed. I really wish we didn’t specialize touch so much in America. Over here I kiss everyone (even people Iiterally just met) on each cheek and it feels nice. It’s totally platonic. As it should be. The waitress finally asked me where I was from and we talked in Spanish a little bit. She was from Ecuador. She’s the only human being I had a conversation with yesterday but that’s okay. I’m headed to Portugal now to stay at an airbnb with surfers who allegedly all know English. So maybe my time of linguistic solitude is over for now.