One of the most peculiar things I’ve gotten paid to do 


I’ve done a LOT of random jobs in my life, but this was especially true when I first moved to NYC. I was constantly searching Craigslist’s for work and I had no contacts or money so you can imagine how creative I got with the job search. But this job was probably one of the most unusual. I got paid to drive these international ultimate fighters around New Jersey. I’d pick them all up from the airport and shuttle them to their hotels, take them to the gym, to Whole Foods, to go get weighed, to get their physicals, to the actual fights, and then back to the airport on their last day. 


The problem was they were gonna fight each other! So they really weren’t supposed to be talking, lest they become friends and not want kick the shit out of each other quite so much in the ring. So I had to drive only people from different divisions around together, making the logistics of my job a complete pain in the ass. I think I slept maybe  4 hours every night, max. But I did get my own hotel room at the Hyatt in New Jersey which was a first (I usually only slept in my car when I traveled). 


The last day was the funniest because  I kept showing up at the airport with a van full of fighters on crutches with black eyes. I definitely got a lot of weird looks. And half of them didn’t speak English all that well, so I had to figure out fighter pantomime talk.
It was a super random, fun weekend that introduced me to the world of entertainment and how fucked up and stupid long the days are. But I love the industry with all my heart. Turns out I belonged more on film sets though, not in the fighter world. 
What was also weird was, by the time the match came around, I liked them all like brothers and didn’t  much enjoy watching them beat each other to a pulp. 
One interesting note though- there were two female fighters (meaning they fought each other) but they were actually friends! They somehow managed to put emotions aside to get the job done, which I found hilarious since I’ve been told my whole life that women are emotional and can’t be president cuz of our inability to do that kind of thing. Perhaps we can finally put that outdated notion to bed. Anger is an emotion! And these guys were piiiiiissed at each other.

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