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Any Guy I Date Must Be Willing to Eat Here lol

Posted by melaniehamlett on April 20, 2016November 5, 2016

West Hollywood, CA

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This guy is so romantic and cheesy but genuine and not full of shit so even his cheesy shit is just so sweet instead of 🤮. Today I came out of the bathroom with my grandma shower cap on (for the first time) and he looked at me all lovingly and said “awwwww, chéri!!! Your little hat is so cute!” The dude loves to see me in the most embarrassing moments cuz they apparently make him “feel closer” to me? I dunno. I’m so new at healthy relationships still. Apparently I don’t have to pose or pretend or hide anything about myself ever and it’s fucking weird y’all but super cool.

My bf’s family used to run pony tours for tourists and they still have two of them left. So today I hung out with a dog and a horse and a pony out in the country and I can’t think of any better way to spend my Saturday. Look at this pony! So much hair!

I got this “job” on craigslist when I was a struggling artist in NYC. They paid 50 bucks to run tests on people for asthma for a couple hours. I do not have asthma and this was not a problem for some reason. They made me sit in this airtight booth that reminded me of the game show ones where you grab money blowing around, and hooked me up to all this crap. I had to breath really hard into this hose thingy for a long time. After we were done, they offered me two hundred bucks to be a part of some OTHER study where they’d put me under the knife and take some sample from my throat or glands or whatever. Can’t remember but it seemed weird.They said there were some risks involved but not to worry. Easy peasy! Despite being pretty desperate for rent money. I said “let me think about it,” which I usually don’t do. Something about going under anesthesia for something so dumb seemed too risky, especially since they were so vague about what the hell they were gonna do. Pretty sure my sister talked me out of it. The only other person who answered this add was a lady I joked around with in the waiting room. She lived out in Far Rockaway, which is like a 1.5 hour train ride from this sketch midtown “doctor’s office.” She not only spent 2 hours there like me but 3 hours in transit to get there. It put my privilege in perspective hard core. Even I wasn’t that desperate for work. She also agreed to this surgery thing. I think about her a lot. I hope she’s ok. This is one of many “jobs” I found on craigslist that were straight up BONKERS. These are all pics the nurse took except the one of tanks, which was taken inside the money booth thingy #starvingartist

Just learned there are categories to Catholic Churches. This princess castle looking thing isn’t a cathedral, it’s a basilica, which is apparently way more fancy for some religious reason involving the pope that I don’t care about because the pedophile stuff is a real stumbling block for my respect but I digress. It sure is pretty, though!

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