Before the Parade started, I wandered around and tried to make friends

and look who I met! Sony and Cher!

and then this couple!

and then all these people.

and then this priest guy

and this guy

These ladies let me sit in their car with them for awhile

and after I posed with this guy, I had white paint all over me.

This guy was protesting at the parade – for the rights of foreskin

And just when I thought I’d met them all, I saw her

fucking ARIEL!

We waited about three hours before they would let us get in the parade. During that time there was a spontaneous dance party. People were booty-bouncing against cars

and dry-humping on the hoods of them.

My friends and I didn’t really have a group to march with so we formed our own.

And we just marched.

But then we saw these ladies behind us on the Old Navy float

and totally had to join them.

I mean, look at that – dresses made of FLIP FLOPS

One of my favorite things about the parade, though, was the crowd.

I mean, even the ROYAL FAMILY was there!

And then, to cap off the end of the most perfect day, I met a real American hero.