Last Monday I answered a craigslist post wanting someone to help him move from NYC to Vermont at $20/hr. I assumed only wholesome people live in or move to Vermont. I responded to the add saying this via email:
“I’d love to help you move. I move things for a living – I work as a set dresser on films, so I move furniture and heavy boxes all the time. I was also an Outward Bound Insturctor before that, so I’m used to carrying 75 lb backpacks for days on end. I lived on the road for years doing seasonal work, so roadtrips are always fun for me and I get along with just about anyone. Give me a call if you still need someone. I may be a woman, but I’m just as strong as most men….or stronger than some. I’ve attached a photo so you can see I’m not a sketchy person.”
Today, one week later, this was our dialoguie via email:
HIM (he wrote in all caps) at 2:48 pm:
YES I WAS ALREADY MOVED BUT I WILL PASS ON YOUR INFO TO THE GUY WHO MOVED ME. [why would he do that?] DO YOU DO OTHER WORK SUCH AS MASSAGES? HAVE YOU ANOTHER PIC?
HIM at 3:37pm:
i pay well for a massage
ME at 6:47pm:
sorry, but I’m not interested in doing massage.
HIM at 7:15 pm:
ok then i will massage you
HIM at 7:30 pm:
can you send a pic where your not making a face? [my Mom says that same thing to me all the time!!!!]
HIM at 7:45 pm:
when you masterbate do you get thast white girl cream?
Interesting fact about me: I attract sexual predators wherever I go. I don’t know why. For instance, I had a 70 yr old hitchiker, who claimed to own a gold mine and offered to buy me a new truck, staulk me from Wyoming to New Mexico, where he found the location in which I was living in my truck. He then asked me to marry him. So, I think I have a magnet for creepy older men.
But, it’s not like I was answering from the sex column. I was just trying to get a good paying job that sounded fun. How is it that I found the only sexual predator in the manual labor section of craigslist? Don’t smart predators fish for naive women with adds looking for a “personal assistant who is good at an occasional neck massage”? (I actually answered one just like that when I moved to New York but he ended up wanting more than massages.)
While the many encounters I have with creepy men make for good stories, they’re not easy to tell cuz I know I look like an idiot.
My question now: Is he starting an online predator relationship with me from Vermont?
Thank God my game party friends from craigslist aren’t creepy.