I told Dora we’d go wherever she wanted. I couldn’t help but feel bad for what the Jolly Green Giant did to her two days earlier.
Surprise, Surprise. She wanted to go back to Wall Drug, South Dakota. The most obnoxious place in the world.
I met this nice lady there. It felt good to talk to another adult for once.
I told Dora she could go play by herself for awhile.
For some reason, people like Dora. She made friends with these dudes right away
Me and the lady in green didn’t have much to say to each other, but I wasn’t really in the mood to talk anyways
The guy behind me in the other room was apparently getting upset
Dude with Gun: Don’t make me shoot you here in front of this sweet little girl
Dora: It’s okay. I’ve never seen anyone get shot before. This is exciting!
Me to Myself: one little, two little, three little indians. four little, five little, six……
After watching someone get murdered, Dora wandered around until she met this man. He sang her a song.
Then they ended up singing a duet together
Me to Myself: Hat on head, nose that’s red, beard that’s white. Christmas night. Must be santa…..
After her song was over, Dora wandered around until she came across this hotel/jail/graveyard.
Dora: Oh my! This is one of those gun thingies
Dora: Excuse me. Can you tell me how to shoot this thing
Teenager with Gun: Just pull the trigger. Duuuuuh.
Me: Dora! What are you doing with that gun? You know better than that.
Dora: But you shot guns with those Amish people that one time
Me: That was a long time ago. Besides, how do you know that? You were in the car.
Dora: I saw it on your blog thingy. You always forget I know how to use the computer even though we’re facebook friends
Me: Whatever. Listen, I’m older than you, so I’m allowed to shoot guns. Besides, you really SUCK at this. I mean, look at where you’re aiming that thing. Are you trying to miss him entirely?
Dora: I know how to point a gun
Me: WHOOOOOAAAAA. Hold on little lady. Don’t point a gun in my face, okay?
Dora: Well don’t make fun of me, okay?
Dora: See, I can shoot. I’m gonna nail him right in his jewels
Me: You don’t even know what jewels are.
Dora: Of course I do. Remember the Jolly Green Giant two days ago?
Me: Whoooooooa. Okay, okay. Point made. Now put the gun down please.
Dora: Sorry.
Me: So where to?
Dora: T-Rex!
Dora: Look at those teeth. They could tear you to shreds.
Me: Dora, you’re acting so strange these days. What’s with the aggression?
Dora: I don’t know. I like things that kill other things.
Me: Well, you’re twisted. Let’s get the rock out of here!!!!
Best day of Dora being super aggressive on Summer Tour 2009 ever. To see the story about the Amish (on my second day of summer tour!!) click below
http://melaniehamlett.com/2009/07/02/quakers-guns-and-me/
To see the story of the Jolly Green Giant that made Dora into an aggro psycho nut-job, see the posting from two days ago.
