Daily Archives: July 28, 2009

The Weirdest Elephant Museum Ever (part 1)

Dora was getting on my last nerve one morning on the road, so I pulled over as soon as I saw this comfy lounge chair. I needed to cool off before I ended up slapping her.
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Little did I know, I stopped at Mr.Ed’s,

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which was an “Elephant Museum, Candy Store, and Incredible Gift Shop”

I was out like a light in seconds. Anger and driving tend to induce narcoleptic attacks.
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While I was asleep, an elephant walked up behind me.

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It played in the pond

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along with the rubber duckie.

When I walked around it, I noticed the flowers around its neck

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and the sign near its leg

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I think he’s named after the Confederate General Lee (and famous car from The Dukes Of Hazzard)

I walked up the porch
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and found these signs.

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When I went into the woods, I found all kinds of stuff.

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Elephant stuff
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and random things like
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A Depressed Tree-Pig eating corn on the cob

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The Seven Dwarfs

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Boat/flower pots

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A Skeleton taking a crap in an outhouse

And Giraffes!
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When you look in the mirror, two giraffes kiss you
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I also found deer
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and cows
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or were they elephants?
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And then i found Dora riding a bull made of tires
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She also tried riding an elephant
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Me: Dora, you know how much you suck at riding animals. Remember that jack-a-lope? Why don’t you just sit back and watch a real pro.
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Me: Are you watching, Dora?
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Dora: Yes

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Just then, I discovered the Giant Talking and Blinking Albino Elephant
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When I went over to the ginormous bag of peanuts to feed the albino elephant, Dora disappeared.
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Dora: Look, a boat! I love boats

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Me: That’s it. You’re grounded. Go sit in the car.

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Dora: But I didn’t do any—
Me: Shut it.

Until Dora ruined it by being so rebellious, it was the BEST DAY at an Elephant Museum on Summer Tour 2009 EVER.

to be continued……….