Daily Archives: April 17, 2009

The Craigslist Perve

This is the picture I unknowingly sent to the Perve on Craigslist

This is the picture I sent to a PERVE on Craigslist

Last Monday I answered a craigslist post wanting someone to help him move from NYC to Vermont at $20/hr.  I assumed only wholesome people live in or move to Vermont.  I responded to the add saying this via email:

“I’d love to help you move.  I move things for a living – I work as a set dresser on films, so I move furniture and heavy boxes all the time. I was also an Outward Bound Insturctor before that, so I’m used to carrying 75 lb backpacks for days on end.  I lived on the road for years doing seasonal work, so roadtrips are always fun for me and I get along with just about anyone.  Give me a call if you still need someone.  I may be a woman, but I’m just as strong as most men….or stronger than some.  I’ve attached a photo so you can see I’m not a sketchy person.”

Today, one week later, this was our dialoguie via email:

HIM (he wrote in all caps) at 2:48 pm:

YES I WAS ALREADY MOVED BUT I WILL PASS ON YOUR INFO TO THE GUY WHO MOVED ME. [why would he do that?] DO YOU DO OTHER WORK SUCH AS MASSAGES? HAVE YOU ANOTHER PIC?

HIM at 3:37pm:

i pay well for a massage

ME at 6:47pm:

sorry, but I’m not interested in doing massage.

HIM at 7:15 pm:

ok then i will massage you

HIM at 7:30 pm:

can you send a pic where your not making a face? [my Mom says that same thing to me all the time!!!!]

HIM at 7:45 pm:

when you masterbate do you get thast white girl cream?

Interesting fact about me:  I attract sexual predators wherever I go. I don’t know why.  For instance,  I had a 70 yr old hitchiker, who claimed to own a gold mine and offered to buy me a new truck,  staulk me from Wyoming to New Mexico, where he found the location in which I was living in my truck.  He then asked me to marry him.  So, I think I have a magnet for creepy older men.

But, it’s not like I was answering from the sex column. I was just trying to get a good paying job that sounded fun.  How is it that I found the only sexual predator in the manual labor section of craigslist? Don’t smart predators fish for naive women with adds looking for a  “personal assistant who is good at an occasional neck massage”? (I actually answered one just like that when I moved to New York but he ended up wanting more than massages.)

While the many encounters I have with creepy men make for good stories, they’re not easy to tell cuz I know I look like an idiot.

My question now: Is he starting an online predator relationship with me from  Vermont?

Thank God my game party friends from craigslist aren’t creepy.